For those who know me well, they would understand how much I need order in my life and don't cope well with things out place. I tend to hide away from the world until I've got my head clear. I clean way too much and crave alone time. I haven't had time to do any of that this week. I feel like I'm just running. ALL.OF.THE.TIME. Now, I just need to find the balance so I can keep sane.
I just want to thank everyone for being patient while I settle into this working thing. Until I find some semblance of work/life balance I'm finding it tricky to blog at bigwords, but I will. I need this space. I crave it.
I also want to ask you all - how do you do it? How do you meet all your commitments and still spend quality time with your family, get the washing done and get out of the house by yourself?
To give you some motivation to help me I've arranged for a super cool giveaway.
For two other winners, I've got a $20 gift voucher each for the simply gorgeous online clothing store for little funksters - Hootkid. Here's the Hootkid Facebook page - please go and like it. The e-shop is the brainchild of Caroline Marvelli - a very savvy and lovely mumpreneur. She's had years of fashion experience working as a buyer for some of Australia's largest retailers. I love supporting women who go for it. I bet she'd have some good tips for juggling work and family life and how important it is go for your dreams.
So, I need your help. How do you do it - work, play and chill with your family? Please give me some of your best tips? And remember to leave a way to contact you.
Winners will be announced next weekend.
Way to go..your exhausted but you made it through the frist week!! Planning works for me, meal plan for the week, kids activities and appointments on the fridge where I can see and easily be reminded...rest when you can, go for a walk to clear your head, ask for help when you need it...and be FLEXIBLE with all the planning things will still go crazy so just hang on and go with the flow :)
ReplyDeleteVery carefully! But I love being busy. It makes me appreciate my downtime so much more.
ReplyDeleteWe have a schedule, a routine, everything gets written down or it doesn't happen!!! Soemtimes it's ugly and messy still, but it mostly works for us!!!!
ReplyDeleteYou know me B - I am up at 5am every day. And I go to bed early. In between times, I write lists. And bark orders at the kids so they help. xx
ReplyDeleteI have been trying to work this out for 5 years. I still don't have a system, still have a filthy bathroom and still have not had a date night (actually, that is 6 years for a date night). Most people I know who manage to work this out have some kind of family to rely on, even a little, like a once a month babysit or something. If you have access to that, take it.
ReplyDeleteI would suggest meal planning, one hour a day dedicated to cleaning one room thoroughly, set your washing machine as you go to bed, turn it on as soon as you get up, hang the clothes as soon as you get home from the kindy run. Bring them in again after you pick up the kindy kid. Getting dressed is essential. If there's any kind of emergency and you have to leave the house, you won't be caught in your fuzzy bunny slippers.
ReplyDeleteAlso, when your mind is filled with potential blog posts, type them all out at once then schedule them to post over a week or so.
ReplyDeleteKeeping lists and set times for things. And when you are doing things, really be in the moment rather than feeling like you are simply moving from one thing to next without experiencing anything. Usually being in the moment means you do it better any way.
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on the new role :)
ReplyDeleteI stay semi-organised with a family planner that goes on the fridge every Sunday night. Each of us has a column and EVERY activity is written in so that we all know what's going on. It has our meal plan below it.
The real truth? I don't know anyone who has it 100% together 100% of the time. They just work with their own version of 'organised'. For some people that means employing a cleaner, for others that means leaving the cleaning all until the weekend .
You'll find your own rhythm over time, and sometime things won't work out - but that's ok too. Just take a deep breath and start afresh the following day
I have been a Mum for 13.5 years. And now have 4 children. And still don't know how I do it. I have friends having their first children now - late 30's, and are flabbergasted that I can do anything, let alone keep my children alive, my husband happy, hold down a part time job, blog, have a small sewing business and actually breath every day. What I have found is that I am unable to do all of that without something not being up to "my standards" - and that is housework. I do manage to get washing done and dried/folded...but it may sit in the back room for a week. I do manage to have the house "clean" - but never tidy. I do manage to get all of my kids to every.single.activity.every.bloody.day. But I don't often manage to find an activity to do myself, without feeling bad about putting one of the kids or my husband out. The one thing that does help me out is a diary. I tend to hyperventilate if I think I have lost it - like last week!
ReplyDeleteBut I DO love my life. And I wouldn't change a thing. A messy house is a sign of a busy family. x
Mum since I was 22...just had baby number 5 four weeks ago. Still have no idea how I do it. I always feel like I'm doing such a crappy job juggling all these kids lives.
ReplyDeleteThen I had a bit of an Oprah A-Ha moment this morning when we took all the kids and the dog to the beach with the husband. Told the husband to take the kids for a walk while I boobed the baby...kids ran amok, dogs collar broke, husband looked frazzled...and I hadn't laughed so hard for ages because none of that would have even phased me. Mums rock.
I don't do it - at least, not any more. For six years I juggled a full-time job as a corporate lawyer in Tokyo with one, and then two children. I tried so hard to make it work. Like Kate Reddy, I had lists, and plans, and help from a nanny and a cleaner and a husband, and like Kate Reddy, suddenly I would be thrust into the middle of some urgent project and everything would go pear-shaped. I ended up exhausted to the very core of my being, missing my children (and my husband!) so much I couldn't stand it any more, and wondering what the hell I was doing. With my husband's support, ultimately I quit my job and now live a simpler and happier life in a different country, spending time with my children, studying a new language during their preschool hours, and wondering if I will ever manage to take the plunge back into paid work. "I Don't Know How She Does It" made me cry buckets of tears because many scenes were horribly familiar (I posted about it here: http://theheadspaceblog.blogspot.com/2011/11/i-dont-know-how-she-does-it.html)
ReplyDeleteI'm not advocating that you quit your job - absolutely not! - but I will say: try to stay in control of your work-flow, take all the help you possibly can and do not feel bad/guilty about it, and don't sweat the small stuff. Most importantly, whenever you feel in your heart that the balance is not working and it's not just an anomaly, find a way to adjust it. You will thank yourself for it :)
sorry, my link should have been:
ReplyDeletehttp://theheadspaceblog.blogspot.com/2011/11/i-dont-know-how-she-does-it.html
I'm not sure any one person can do it all. I think one of the best bits of advice I received when I had my baby was that it was OK to lower your expectations of what you can get done in a day. With a newborn I gave myself a high five if I'd had a shower and had three meals (as well as keeping the new human alive all day)
ReplyDeleteIf you think you should be 'doing it all' you might end up going nuts! Just give yourself some adjustment time.
My approach is to try and constantly evaluate and re-evaluate priorities, and ask myself "is this really important or can it wait?". "What are my most important tasks for the day and when am I going to set aside time for the things that NEED to get done." You will never get everything done, so it is important to accept that. If a clean house is important to your sanity, lock away some time for housework. But also, very importantly, set aside some dedicated family time where you forget about all the other things waiting to be done and spend some quality time with your loved ones!
ReplyDeleteHow do I do it? Badly.
ReplyDeleteSome days and weeks are better than others, and that's what I've learnt to live with. Sometimes a perfectly clean & cleared kitchen bench is just not going to happen. Hubby and I do what we can when we can, and now the kids are older they help out more.
Some weekends I combine movie watching with the kids with a glass of wine and washing folding. Sometimes the washing doesn't get folded for 2 weeks.
And that little voice inside my head that tells me enough is enough and to please just stop... I have started to listen to it. It's amazing how much more productive I am because of it and home and at work.
My husband has been in Perth so I have been single-mumming for the past three out of four weeks and I am exhausted. I have a chronic health condition, so I need to take care of the unimportant things, so the important things stay in check. To this end, I hired a cleaner and a lawn mower person this week. I just needed to make my life easier. Now to find someone who folds up washing and puts it away. :)
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