It Take A Village - Beloverly

It Takes A Village... to raise a child. So, I'm asking bloggers from my village to each write a message for me to pass on to my girls. If you'd like to write one, let me know.

This week's message to my girls is from the loveliest gal in the world Cat, who writes the blog Wouldn't It Be Loverly.

Dear lovely Bigword-lettes

Your wise, talented and very loving Mum has asked me to pen some words of advice to you and I hope you don't find what I have to say causes too much in the way of making you roll your eyes or mutter, "silly old bag" under your breath, but here is what I would tell my daughter if I had one. 

Be proud of being a girl and then a woman.


I don't have daughters, I have sons. Not having a daughter is something I know I will miss, but I have come to accept that it's my responsibility to raise two wonderful boys who will become wonderful men who will stand as your equals in a world where both men and women are given equal chances. 

You see, I'm a feminist. Saying you're a feminist is fine if you are as old as your mum or me, but it's not very popular amongst young women and I think will be even less popular as you grow. There are women before you who sacrificed much. There are still women who are persecuted because they are women. In our Western world, it can mean things like not getting equal pay for the same job as a man, but there are women in other parts of the world who suffer horrors for the simple reason they were born as girls.  

Sometimes, not getting what you want is the best thing that could ever happen. You'll find a way to get it or something much better will come along. 

A balanced life is elusive - you will always feel the tug of, "I should" in a lot of different ways. The important part is to embrace that and understand that at some times specific things need more attention than others. Never more so than if you one day have your own children. 

Don't be scared to love hard but don't ever compromise yourself in the name of love. No one is worth giving up a piece of yourself to.

Listen to your inner voice. You know, the one that never, ever shuts up. If it is screaming something at you NEVER ignore it. My mum once told me that if I felt like I couldn't tell her about what I was doing I probably shouldn't be doing it. The inner voice can make you braver than you ever thought you could be, but will also stop you doing really stupid things too. And, if you do ignore it, use it as a lesson to yourself.

Close enough is good enough - don't let anyone fool you in to thinking you can achieve perfection. This seems defeatist, but perfection is not achievable. You DO NOT need to be perfect, but you do need to be well, you! 

Don't be scared to dream big! Like really, really, really, really big! And don't be scared of having a simple life either. This seems like conflicting advice, but both can be equally scary.  It's just important to be well, YOU!

Being a teenager doesn't last forever. Thank God for that!!! 

Read. A lot! Anything you can. It will bring joy to you in so, so, so many ways. 

Forgive each other.  Families are nuts, truly but if you can find a way to forgive each other for all the silly things that irk you about each other you'll come through life with the best ally possible, a sibling!  A sibling is the only person who truly knows how bonkers your parents are after all.

Forgive yourself! You'll do dumb things. We all do. Don't beat yourself up over it.  

You don't have to be happy ALL the time. Life's not about that.  It's about light, shade and every single thing in between and you'll be all the richer for it. 

And lastly, call your Mum and tell her you love her as often as you can, even if you don't feel like it. She will want to hear it for the rest of her days. 

I hope you're still awake after all this advice lovely girls.

I wish you a life full to the brim with adventure, love and soul.

Much love,

Cat

Adelaide-based Cat is a girly girl who is surrounded by boys. She's a Mama to two outrageously noisy but amazing little boys, Bebito aged 3 and Little Lion aged 7 months and is married to the world's noisiest but supremely lovely man. She is constantly seeking some peace and quiet. She was born a book geek, loves pretty things - especially shoes, yummy food, getting her craft on and champagne. She is constantly trying to stifle her champagne taste on her mineral water budget and is the kind of gal who unapologetically wears her heart on her sleeve. She blogs at Wouldn't It Be Loverly and tweets at @beloverly